He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize