I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I haven't been this sober since birth.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize