It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
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He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
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We are all done wearing pants today
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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