guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize