Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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