I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
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i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
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The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
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