So drunk its hurt
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
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