okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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