i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
There r osticjed everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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