So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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