hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
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He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
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Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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