so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
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on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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