I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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