i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
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Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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