its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
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