I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
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