They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
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