I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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