and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
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