I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
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