I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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