the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
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it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
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