Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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