I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
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She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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