What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize