Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
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