She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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