Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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