it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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