You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
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to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
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I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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