i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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