Texts From Last Night

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  (309): View more from Illinois

  $35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.

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  (309): $35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively. http://tfl.nu/sa2o
  Replies (6) Good night (1177) Bad night (493)
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  (212): View more from New York

  the recession has oofficially hit my standards.

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  (212): the recession has oofficially hit my standards. http://tfl.nu/xl9z
  Replies (5) Good night (692) Bad night (1839) Order T-Shirt
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride

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  (417): I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride http://tfl.nu/qcn3
  Replies (6) Good night (468) Bad night (2535) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...

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  (615): I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look... http://tfl.nu/yc9r
  Replies (8) Good night (998) Bad night (2889) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?

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  (503): I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number? http://tfl.nu/ltxf
  Replies (55) Good night (3234) Bad night (995) Order T-Shirt
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.

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  (816): After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship. http://tfl.nu/v7rc
  Replies (12) Good night (3250) Bad night (630) Order T-Shirt
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...

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  (517): She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name... http://tfl.nu/ngxr
  Replies (17) Good night (4724) Bad night (774) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  ...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.

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  (717): ...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk. http://tfl.nu/2qzx
  Replies (4) Good night (1748) Bad night (679) Order T-Shirt
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?

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  (208): I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become? http://tfl.nu/ygut
  Replies (6) Good night (1375) Bad night (1258) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.

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  (913): I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/25xf
  Replies (3) Good night (1720) Bad night (497) Order T-Shirt
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  (253): View more from Washington

  There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.

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  (253): There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs. http://tfl.nu/3p74
  Replies (22) Good night (5099) Bad night (622) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.

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  (401): I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you. http://tfl.nu/woyu
  Replies (7) Good night (727) Bad night (242) Order T-Shirt
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.

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  (573): Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her. http://tfl.nu/nucq
  Replies (9) Good night (1102) Bad night (572) Order T-Shirt
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  (727): View more from Florida

  What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked

  (539): View more from

  All of it

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  (727): What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked (539): All of it http://tfl.nu/fe2w
  Replies (5) Good night (540) Bad night (286)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.

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  (330): Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative. http://tfl.nu/cyri
  Replies (1) Good night (291) Bad night (150) Order T-Shirt

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