I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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