Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize