Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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