Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize