You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize