I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
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Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
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My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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