Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(773): View more from Illinois

I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.

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(773): I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs. http://tfl.nu/fbpk

Replies (17) Good night (660) Bad night (3339) Order T-Shirt
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(727): View more from Florida

writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.

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(727): writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later. http://tfl.nu/11rn

Replies (16) Good night (3775) Bad night (586) Order T-Shirt
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(770): View more from Georgia

So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...

(404): View more from Georgia

Dont! You were just serving you country

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(770): So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now... (404): Dont! You were just serving you country http://tfl.nu/lcsl

Replies (71) Good night (6665) Bad night (2274)
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(318): View more from Louisiana

We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done

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(318): We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done http://tfl.nu/r8w7

Replies (4) Good night (3349) Bad night (1011) Order T-Shirt
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(630): View more from Illinois

At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us

(847): View more from Illinois

You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.

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(630): At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us (847): You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high. http://tfl.nu/59an

Replies (6) Good night (2636) Bad night (1208)
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(502): View more from Kentucky

She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....

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(502): She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage.... http://tfl.nu/ha8c

Replies (6) Good night (2695) Bad night (1065) Order T-Shirt
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(985): View more from Louisiana

Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.

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(985): Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am. http://tfl.nu/mwe3

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(580): View more from Oklahoma

And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.

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(580): And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities. http://tfl.nu/eu72

Replies (10) Good night (2740) Bad night (658) Order T-Shirt
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams

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(717): You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams http://tfl.nu/9pxu

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(626): View more from California

I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.

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(626): I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing. http://tfl.nu/hf05

Replies (2) Good night (997) Bad night (558) Order T-Shirt
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(810): View more from Michigan

Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.

(1-810): View more from Michigan

I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.

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(810): Two word: claymation porn. Think about it. (1-810): I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me. http://tfl.nu/emwe

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(509): View more from Washington

So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"

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(509): So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila" http://tfl.nu/anii

Replies (3) Good night (1971) Bad night (357)
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(718): View more from New York

Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"

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(718): Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards" http://tfl.nu/67i1

Replies (5) Good night (1204) Bad night (393) Order T-Shirt
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(315): View more from New York

This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID

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(315): This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID http://tfl.nu/jlhh

Replies (3) Good night (915) Bad night (323) Order T-Shirt
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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina

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(267): All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina http://tfl.nu/o3rx

Replies (11) Good night (1348) Bad night (311) Order T-Shirt

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