He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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