Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
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Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
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long story
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weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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