In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize