My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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