Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize