Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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