you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize