Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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