i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
being pregnant is like rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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