I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Swine flu. Run for my life!
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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