...so i touched it.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Randomize